Monday, December 13, 2010

A Place of No Return

From where I began to where I am now;

What has changed?

What has gone and what has come?

What has ended from where it had begun?

From nowhere to nothing have I reached,

From dust to dust remained.

Time has traveled distance,

Moments and memories too,

But something has remained; the way it’s supposed to.

I’ve looked all around, to where I should go?

No clue, no sign nor feeling have I to lead me so,

The stars foretell a future, a destiny I read not,

My hand has lines that lead to where, I still doubt.

There’s something dying within;

Whose saving drug ain’t there,

Life’s battles are at hand,

And neither my sergeants nor soldiers there.

Fears are freezing and may be emotions go

But things have to go on,

Why, is not for me to know.

The trees have withered leaves,

The spring has them returned,

People have lost feelings,

Love has got them back unturned.

Nightmares have turned real,

Dreams are still dreaming,

What was expected to stay has gone,

What had to go; lived on.

Breakable threads have relations joined,

Broken promises stayed in mind.

No roads have changed, no paths have turned,

May be I’ve trod too far; to a place of no return.

Monday, November 15, 2010

When You Wonder What Life Is

Once u know what life is,

You wonder if you've lived it.

Experienced the dew drops sprinkle,

Seen those tiny shining things at night twinkle.

You wonder if you've felt the river gush at you,

Fighting against brought out the soldier in you.

Have u played with beetles and caught them in jars?

Seen the winter frost change colour of cars.

Have u ever heard the spooky roar of the tiger on the hill?

Fallen down in ditches nature missed to fill.

Have u ever gone beneath the sea and looked at the sun?

Screamed your name to hear echoes from the Holy one.

Have u ever climbed a mountain and stood at the top?

Feeling the world in your hands, like a globe as a prop.

Have u ever heard the screaming silence of the valley?

The soft breeze; like a mother's touch, caring dearly.

Have ever seen a new born smile?

In a single moment chase your fears for miles,

Have you ever looked at the sky above?

Wondering what if you were a bird,

Have you ever felt the rains drops on your face?

The fragrance of a shower on the mud of the earth's furnace,

Have you ever lived life as light as a feather?

Not wondering where to go, yet with someone forever.

Have you ever wondered what life is?

And once you've thought about things big & small,

You look back;

Have I lived it at all?

Saturday, September 18, 2010

That Inward Crying

The blades of betrayal you thrust inside,
Twisting them to make you bleed,
Too used to the pain,
You turn & turn,
Not numb enough to let you sleep.

Your veins wreck,
The gust too strong,
The tears roll,
But not for long.

You twist & turn,
The hole too deep,
The blood flows,
But you don't weep.

Nothing left to cut you more,
The blades too blunt,
The wounds too sore.
No tears now,
No blood left to fall,
Just that inward crying,
The sharpest pain of them all.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Pursuit of Happiness

It is really common to hear that people are depressed or frustrated. Ask them why? and they would not know. This post is neither an answer to the problems nor a spiritual path to happiness, it is nothing more than an introspection:

We are often, consciously or unconsciously, governed by what the world thinks, what people have to say. Invariably we are brought up being told that we should study because our neighbour's son/daughter studies or studied and did well in life. Our sense of morality, success and failure are bent to understand that the opinions of everyone else are superior to ours, and they are the conclusive test of what we are in life.

Slowly, our own sense of thought, logic, morality, happiness, start to become what is thrust upon us by a collective whose identity is impossible to establish. Curiously enough, this collective comprises individuals whose idea of morality etc. is totally different from the community standards they project. My point, in summary, being that we live our lives the way 'they' want us to live it.

Day in and day out, our choices are determined by what people will say or what they will do. My question is: your life, your decisions, you face the consequences of your decisions, then why care about the people? The thing about people is that will always talk and they have a really short memory. They want to talk because they have nothing better to do. If you sit and do nothing, you are useless, if you go ahead and do something, they are just jealous. If dogs don't bark, what else will they do?

We live so much of our lives being what people want us to be that we forget who we really are and when we do things for other people we are bound to be frustrated. We can only excel or enjoy things when we do what we want to do. Our lives have gradually turned into an hypocrite pledge to satisfy others and the biggest problem is that you can never truly satisfy the people or the community standard, simply because there is none! Only when we define our life by what we want, there can be satisfaction, only then can we truly relate to that elated feeling called happiness.

"Ninty per cent of our lives are lived for other people and then we wonder why we aren't happy. The ten per cent is who we are, what defines us, what makes us happy."

You get to live once, live life KING size!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

He Wasn't There

When the dice of fate roll,
Would you question the game; your God; or your future told?
When in a lifetime of joys, there are moments of sorrow,
Would you give up on him; to whom you prayed each day for a brighter tomorrow.
In the myriads of questions would you seek an answer,
Or let him guide you; your best adviser.

When your kingdom falls and you have no place,
Would you still seek shelter in his holy grace?
When the tides are high and slap your face,
Would you still praise him; who always made you win each race.

When you wonder wither the winds of destiny would turn,
Would you try and change them? Or in your heart will his image burn?
On the glorious road, down that bright aisle,
When all you won, with all smile,
Did you think of him, who got you there?
But you fought with him,
When the dice rolled, and he wasn't there.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Where Were You?

When I was laughing at jokes,
Rejoicing in my victories,
Smiling in happiness,
Where were you?

When I was tired to go on,
When I was smiling in grief,
Feeling everything was over,
Where were you?

When everything went wrong,
The world stood against me,
And none believed me,
Where were you?

When my tears were on the edge,
And I looked for a shoulder to cry on,
Where were you?

When time stood still,
People crushed my faith,
Tore me to pieces,
Where were you?

When I came face to face with myself,
Fighting a never ending war,
And I needed a negotiator,
Where were you?

When my dreams turned into nightmares,
My hopes shattered,
My insecurities doubled,
Fears strengthened,
Where were you?

When all made fun of me,
Laughed at my mistakes,
When I needed a friend,
Where were you?

When I was running away from life,
With no hopes and a million fears,
Where were you?

When I was looking for you all over,
And in my pursuit I fell down,
When I thought you would come to life me up,
Get me back on my feet again,
Where were you?

When all was over,
And I shed my last tear,
Drew a last breath,
Waiting for you to hold me,
Where were you?

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Why India Deserves An Oscar

Bollywood has produced some exceptional, evergreen, and extremely content oriented movies in recent times. Lagaan, Black, Taare Zameen Par etc. but still we do not find a place in the Best Foreign Film category in the Oscars. It is rather unfortunate isn't it?

If one was ever to write a paper on Antonio Gramsci's theory of cultural hegemony, the Oscars are a prime example of how hegemony plays out in the real world. Why are we so crazy about an Oscar? Is recognition by the US all the Indians are dying for? Will that prove to be an acknowledgment that India has arrived at the world stage?

It is how the media plays it, how our minds are shaped by the use of the internet, television and newspapers. When one talks of going abroad, it is usually presumed to be the US. Why? There are so many other countries in the world. They have better cinema, better actors, better standards for judging awards, then why are we so determined to get an Oscar? Is it because it is the most fair system? Or because it is globally accepted as being the most prestigious? Well, neither of them is true.

We tend to blindly replicate the West in whatever fields we can. Our slavery and colonialism is not over yet. Welcome to India of the 21st century whose latest philosophy is "When in doubt, look west". I agree to some extent that there are many things that the west (I mean the US in the present context) has achieved and done better than we could. However, it is not the be all and end all of superior civilization. Have you ever reflected on the t.v. shows and movies produced in India? How many ladies in India are dressed in saris worth thousands and jewelery worth lakhs 24x7 working in the house and cleaning utensils? Or how many boys and girls in India meet on the streets and start singing songs and everyone starts dancing behind them? It is pure drama and nothing else. Then why don't we have the same critical reflection of the shows and movies produced abroad. Not everyone lives the same lifestyle like the ones we see on Desperate Housewives, or Baywatch, or How I Met Your Mother or American Pie. Everyone in the US is not stripping naked and having sex all the time with almost anyone. (And that by no means is the definition of being liberal. But I'll reserve more thoughts on being liberal for another post)

However, getting back to my point, why is an Oscar award so important to us? I think we have been carried away to a point that we are just mesmerized by whatever is happening in the United States. We want to do everything the way they do it. I personally have great faith in our cinema (Yes, we do have our shameful moments like Ram Gopal Verma ki Aag and Jaani Dushman etc.) but our award ceremonies are as good and as fair as any other. Personally, I am one of those who believe that Slumdog Millionaire was awarded Oscars as a propaganda to show Indians in a bad light(I am sure there are those who disagree), and therefore, I believe that the Oscars are not the epitome of fairness and ultimate touchstone of recognizing good cinema.

It is time we start having faith in what we do rather than just be chimps and copy the west or crave for their recognition. When thousands die in India everyday in the floods, riots, due to poverty, earthquakes, we never observe a minute of silence. But when thousands died in 9/11, there was one minute silence in India. God Bless America!

Monday, May 3, 2010


A little worried it seems;
About mistakes made in past days,
A little more nervous;
Of the coming days.
A little stunned by people around,
A little more hurt by people on whom one counts.
Nor love, nor hate, nor faith answer today,
The questions on which life fades away.

A little boy, still wondering why the sky is blue,
Against a man on a quest to find the meaning of ‘true’,
Between them a teenager stuck;
Whom to fight for and on whom to give up?

When friends and foe seem all alike,
In shadows they play; in smiles they hide.
One looks back on everything learnt,
Wondering if it all should be burnt?

It is funny when it breaks; your idea of life.
When all you believed in, is in perpetual strife.
Then you search frantically for philosophies new;
But it is destiny who decides what in life is due.

Then why the wonder; why so much thought?
It is not for you to answer this great holy plot.
And when you learn this sacred truth,
Life would become more pleasant; a lot more beautiful to you.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Our Obsession with Romanticism

"Those were the days". Day in and day out we here the phrase being chanted by different people referring in fondness to the various times gone by. Whether it be school, college, friends, events etc. Just as a thought, why are we so obsessed with romanticizing about the past(This has got nothing to do with the philosophy of history class). Right from the time when we start to relate events to ideas and start judging people in light of narrations from history books(Mughals were barbaric, violent, ruthless invaders and just wanted to loot the country), our impressionable minds are nurtured to believe that the past was very beautiful and that we can never live it again (The Golden Period). The question is: why do we want to live it again?

The first thing we realize or learn about life is its constant state of change, its dynamism. We are stuck in this constant yearning to recreate the past. Simple things like the games you played with friends, things you did in school, parties at college, or even old relationships. Somewhere down the line this romanticism obstructs us to accept the new, the present. We are too busy recreating the past and the present just goes by. Alumni from any institution always say, "things were very different when I was here"(Everyone is aware of the context these lines come up in); aren't they supposed to be? Should the institution just pause in time and be static while the world outside changes?

The best thing about memories is that you cannot relive them. The times you spent with your friends are very precious to you, but one has to accept that the sweetness of those memories can only continue as long as they are memories. If we could recreate everything, reunions would make people come together the same way. But the truth is that life has moved on and the sooner we accept the change the better it is. Because when we try to live our past lives in the present, things aren't the same anymore, (we aren't equals, someone has a better job, someone has more money, someone is married, someone is not etc. etc.) and the sweetness of those memories begins to wither. You land up asking yourself, "were we actually that happy then?".

Political parties, priests, advocates of cultural preservation argue that we are losing our culture. Well, as much as we should learn about our past, we have to embrace the present. Times have changed, and those cultural practices and dogmas cannot be followed any longer, simply because no one has the time. 7 day pujas are cut into 3 days, which also is quite long. The reason for such practices in old times was to create a certain kind of meditation and discipline in people. The only kind of education and means of governing the people was religion. No laws existed like they do now. We are taught these things in schools. Culture has not been lost, it has just changed form(certainly a lot of people would disagree), because the preconditions for its existence no longer exist.

Subconsciously we refuse what the present has to offer in our nostalgia of the past. (Bunty was your best friend then, but not any more). He won't understand and speak to you the same way. You cannot relate to him any longer because you two think very differently now and therefore, Sunny is closer to you than Bunty. This by no means is to say that we should forget old friends, it is just to make ourselves aware how in this constant struggle to recreate the past we miss out on so many new things.

Two points in time can never be exactly the same and we should cherish what came by, because not everyone is lucky enough to have such great memories.

The monotony of life is brushed aside with the unpredictability of the future, and when the future comes, like spring after a cold winter, it brings, but new flowers instead of the old.

Wither Do We Go From Here?

It is hard to fathom,
These acts unkind,
By people you always said were “mine”.
Those boats in which we sailed together;
Leaking now, with this stormy weather.
The oars in half, the mast fallen;
The shores we sailed for,
In vain; still calling.

Our castles of vows slowly wither,
The river wild has brought us hither.
And every part it carefully takes;
Remember the flag with pride we had placed.
The towers we had held together;
Cracked and falling,
Has our love turned bitter?

Our words in silence still knock my ears,
The laughs we had still drown the fears,
The bugle sounds; the end is near,
And wither my friend, do we go from here?

Monday, April 19, 2010

Is an M.B.A Degree Just Another IT Bubble?

It is a fascinating thought, earning almost 2 lakhs a month, having a good apartment, luxury car, expensive apparels and flying to different parts of the world. But is an M.B.A degree the surest way to get there? The problem with most career options in India is the necessity of earning quick money. Parents want it, the students want it, and everyone who cannot get it is jealous of it. 8 out of 10 students in India today are pursuing or wanting to pursue a masters degree in business administration. How many of you out there even know why this degree is important in the market and what skills you acquire by getting this degree? While the 'temptations of this island' are very attracting, few parents and students give thought to many important considerations before opting for or asking their child to take up a career in this area.

Lets face it, at some level we follow the crowd. What was considered a boom in India in the 90's i.e. computer education and engineering is no longer the buzz word in career options. Why? Because US companies are not hiring Indians anymore. The pay packages are not attractive and there is a flood of engineering graduates from the thousands of private engineering colleges. Isn't M.B.A another bubble just like that?

What most people fail to realize is that not all who dream of a career in business administration make it to the various IIM colleges. What is the result? A degree from a private college of almost no repute. Now, according to our mentality and social structure, a person who has got a degree from a private institution, which is not of great repute, wants the same pay package that an IIM graduate gets. People, not everyone can make it to IIM for a reason! Moreover, what most people do not realize is that within the IIM colleges also there are different scales for different colleges. On top of that, the toppers get the attractive offers you read about in the newspapers. Getting there is not enough! Most graduates of the IIM colleges, who are not toppers, get only a decent package ranging between 3-7 lakhs. Not everyone is getting 22 lakhs! Students who graduate from colleges other than IIMs often land up in a job requiring a lower qualification and feel dissatisfied because they compare themselves to the topper of IIM, Ahemdabad.

Also, what many do not realize is that the MBA market is getting saturated, just like the IT industry did. How many amazing job offers do we get to hear about from Wipro and Infosys or some American company? The problem lies in our fundamental approach to career options. We chase the money, not the career and unfortunately, parents want their children only to chase the money and nothing else. The monetary benefits a career can offer are determined by market conditions. It is simple demand and supply. What is on top today may be last tomorrow. There is no safe career in this world which will mint money all your life. Though it seems rather cliche, but pursuing a career of your choice and interest pays in a lot more ways than money. (Yes, 3 Idiots is an inspiring movie) Excelling at what you do will get you anywhere. Each job has equal opportunity, and like someone said "opportunity lies in the man who holds the job".